Eat, Pray, Love

So I am at work right now, at the community center because Bill needed someone, and I have been able to go on the internet (thanks library) and chat during my time here. Which is really nice. But now everyone is away or signed off and I am left alone to my thoughts.

I am thinking so much about Lambec because it's only three days away. I really can't believe my sixth year (!) and my very last as a camper is almost here. I remember the first year I went, going into 8th grade, I didn't understand why I was even going. On the drive up, I was confused why I agreed to spend a week in an unfamiliar place with people that I was only somewhat friends with at the time to play my instrument and sing. I didn't know how much my life was going to change after that week. I realize now that God sent me there, made sure I would be there (after two years of Mr. Cramer asking me to go, I finally gave in) and then introduced this amazing place to me. Since then, I've found it to be one of my very favorite places to be. It's not at all perfect, logistically speaking, but to me, it is. I find immense comfort in watching the sun set over Lake Erie, people strolling along the path, games being played in the vale. I find myself sighing even as I write this. It's hard to explain to people that haven't been there to experience it why it's so wonderful. But the answer is this: it's the people that fill up this amazing place that create this haven. Every year during morning watch, I just look around and feel so blessed. I get away for the week--away from the realities of life and its stresses--and experience the strange mystery that is camp. How can you become best friends with someone you spent just 5 days with? Why do you want to cry when you have to leave? How does one week have the ability to impact your life forever? Life, broken down to its basics is all about meeting people, becoming friends, and interacting. Camp reminds us that everything else is just clutter. The human experience is so healing in itself.

I absolutely love the fact that I have a group of girls that I spent most of my time with at camp. We are a unit, a gang full of laughter and great memories. But I'm realizing, with sadness, that I have missed the opportunity to make better connections with other people. Knowing that some people aren't coming back this year makes me so sad because I feel like I didn't take advantage of the opportunity to make a friend, to share something with someone else. Not to say that I don't do that at all...of course I do. I've met amazing people like Leila, Annette, Nicki, and Kate, and more, but I find myself wishing that I were more...outgoing. Available. Open. Not afraid to randomly strike up a conversation with someone. It's kind of weird. There are people that you know a lot about..how they act, what they are interested in, and because you share an experience like camp with them, you feel like you know them. But in reality, you've only said a few words to each other and you don't really know them at all. I feel like that's my case with a lot of the people.

I'm currently reading a book called Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert and while it's not my favorite book, I'm enjoying it, and it also sheds light on my current situation. The woman, Elizabeth, in the book speaks of her experiences in Italy, India, and Indonesia in the span of a year. In one section, she talks about how while she's not a very "good traveler," she's really good at making friends...like randomly saying hello to someone, striking up a conversation, and becoming friends. I realized that with college so soon, I need to be able to let go of the fear of whatever I'm afraid of and just take the chance and meet someone. This year at camp, I want to be able to bond with my girls AND make connections with other people. I'm hoping I succeed in this because I know it will be an example of what college might be like. Granted, everyone will be looking for friends then and it shouldn't be too hard, but I want to be more comfortable at it.

Life is all about interacting with each other and loving one another. Everything else is just unnecessary stuff that doesn't truly matter. Sometimes you don't realize how valuable a person is to you, how important they are to your life. Shouldn't you try to make connections with more than just those you see every day?

Just some food for thought. :)